I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
