I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
why is half of my head shaved?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize