I hope mine doesn't look like that
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
