so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
