How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize