More tranny stories later!
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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