yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize