do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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