Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
