whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
