He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
