and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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