If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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