I heard we made out
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
