Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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