I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
