You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize