i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
