it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize