erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
