Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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