What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
