OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
