My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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