Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
