Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
