u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Randomize
