I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
When did angry sex become our thing?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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