i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
