Christians are straight up FREAKS
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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