Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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