Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Randomize
