I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
