i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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