it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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