thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
