I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
