my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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