It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
