She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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