awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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