theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
