Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
