we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
