I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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