She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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