The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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