ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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