oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
