for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize